An Open Letter to Those Who Disappear

Dear ________,

Historically, I’m not a very trusting person. It takes a lot for me to get there. To REALLY be who I am with you. To REALLY be ok with who you are. I’ve been through things, but we all have. I guess my difference is that I adapted in such a way that it’s harder for me to open up than most. Once I get to that point though, I’m maximally faithful. I will do whatever’s in my power to make you happy. I feel very deeply and thoughtfully. That being said, people change, people grow, and people aren’t always who you thought they were. It happens. Life happens, and that’s ok. What’s not ok is to write someone you were once close with off as if they never existed, as if they never mattered, without so much as a conversation. If I let you in, you matter. Even if we enviably part ways and never speak again, you mattered, and you’ll know that, but without a conversation, I never will. The age of texting and bailing is a coward’s way out, an easy way to avoid the difficult and move on to what’s easy, for now. Words are important. REAL words. REAL conversations. I thought so when you were pouring your heart out to me about something that mattered to you, I thought so on the good days, and the bad days, and the days when we didn’t have to say many words at all. So I will not apologize for wanting a conversation now. I will not apologize for thinking you owe me that courtesy. The easy way out will only haunt me for a moment, but it may forever haunt your conscious. Don’t be a pussy.

Bukowski Brain

I spend a lot of time trying to fill voids. The problem with said void filling is they are all temporary. A new handsome face, enough vodka to drown a horse, a crowded bar, a new pair of shoes.

Yet the next day feels so empty. My new shoes are scuffed, the vodka high is gone, and none of those handsome brunettes ever want to stick around for a sober conversation.

So here I lay, hungover, tired, hungry, anxious, empty. I’m convinced love’s a cruel joke…but it happens to be one I miss terribly.

Media and Culture Abroad: One Woman’s Transition From Post War Germany to the U.S.

The Following is an interview I did for my Global News and World Media Cultures class. We were searching for perspective from individuals born outside of the U.S. on key differences that they thought existed between media and culture within their country of origin and here. Edith had some excellent points so I thought I’d share. 

Edith, 59, now of Winchester, TN, grew up near the town of Frankfurt am Main in Germany, which is the fifth largest city in the country. She was born in the 50s when the reconstruction was in full swing after World War II. Both of her parents were refugees from different parts of Germany. Her father was a POW of the Americans, and Edith recalls him frequently commenting that the black G.I.s treated the prisoners better than the other soldiers did and would often sneak them extra food.

The post war generations were more accepting of other people and cultures than previous ones had been, Edith says. “I grew up with people of Greek, Italian, Turkish and North African decent, as Germany didn’t have enough labor when the economy was booming in the 60s and 70s.”

Growing up, Edith was expected to respect her elders, offer her seat on the bus to an older person, work for what she wanted, and not to expect someone else to be her safety net. The saying that still rings in her ears today is; “if you make your bed hard, you will sleep hard,” which she translates as taking personal responsibility for one’s own actions.

Education was stressed in Germany and Edith attended school six days each week. She explains that there were different levels or paths one could take based on individual grades and points of interest. She also commented that most Germans were taught more than one language from an early age, and many speak at least three or more fluently. Germans didn’t watch as much T.V. as she says is customary in the U.S., and instead she read books in her free time, which she cites as a principal learning tool for herself, something that Americans tend to put on the back burner, unless required by school.

“We (Germans) know more about what is happening in the rest of the world, and are usually more politically informed. Europeans are usually well traveled and educated about other people and cultures.” 
Edith recalls learning about the Vietnam War and civil rights issues in America. She states, “We were very informed about what America was doing in the rest of the world as well as internally. I believe we received more objective news and the truth than Americans themselves did. Americans were hypocrites to us. You can’t preach human rights to other people when you are one of the worst offenders in the world yourself.”

After meeting her husband, an African American solider stationed in Germany, Edith moved to the  U.S. in the early 70s and began raising a family of her own. She recalls being utterly shocked at the level of poverty that she saw and how primitively some people still lived in America, and in the South particularly. “The level of ignorance about the rest of the world left me speechless, Edith remembers, “The religious hypocrisy was and still is amazing to me, and the racial biases that still exist to this day are showing as to what extent people are really belying their religious beliefs. I am not impressed with the educational levels of the average person and how easily they are manipulated by clever politicians to believe in something that is actually to their own detriment.”

Edith recalls raising her four children at a time when American society was already changing into one where material things became the focal point. “It was important what shoes and jeans one was wearing in school in order to be accepted,” Edith claims. “I think that became an issue in all industrialized nations and not just the U.S. The focus of working hard and educating yourself and personal responsibility had shifted. Parents worked harder to provide luxuries for their children and the children became a generation of people who felt entitled. I personally never felt a sense of entitlement, everything I have I worked for and it makes me also appreciate what I have.”

“Overall I feel that Europeans were privy to objective news about how America and the rest of the world handled their affairs, Edith states, “When you watch the evening news here very little is reported about foreign affairs unless it’s a big deal. Americans have and are living in a vacuum.”

Live On the Green – a green concert series – B.Real Mag

Nashville’s premiere environmentally friendly concert series is returning August 8th through September 12th! Check out the article below which I wrote last year and was featured in B. Real Magazine!


Local concert series is back and greener than ever.

September 6 marks the kickoff of the fourth season of Nashville’s leading environmentally conscious six-week concert series, Live On the Green. This year’s event is sure to please offering one of the most exciting lineups to date. Best of all, the series is free to the public. Yes, free.

Musical acts such as Alabama Shakes, Dr. John, North Mississippi Allstars, Trampled By Turtles, The Wallflowers, and Moon Taxi will grace the stage, along with numerous others. Concerts will begin around 5 p.m. on Thursday evenings though October 11, and will be held in Public Square Park adjacent to the Metro Court House.

“Live On the Green has grown into an incredibly popular concert series with thousands of people looking forward to it each year,” Mayor Karl Dean says of the event. “Highly-talented singers, songwriters, and musicians playing a variety of different genres is what Nashville is all about.”

In addition to live entertainment, this year’s Live On the Green will feature a craft beer garden, a Green Thumb Zone for families, an expanded food court, and a VIP area for your pooch. Yes, even your leashed furry friends are welcome!

Live On the Green is noticeably doing its part to offset its own carbon footprint and to promote green living in Nashville. The series is involved in a number of efforts including the use of energy-efficient sound and lighting, offering high quality organic merchandising, and even requiring participating vendors to use only recyclable and biodegradable materials. Vendors are also instructed to prepare just enough food expected to sell. Any remaining portions must be donated or composted.

In an attempt to prevent pollution caused by travel, out of town performers are asked to agree to use the most environmentally friendly means of transportation available. A free bike check will also be offered for locals. Three dollar parking is available in the garage directly below the grounds for those who choose to drive.

The 2.25 acre lot where the event is located known as the “Green Roof,” sits atop a five story parking garage and acts as a rainwater collection system. The roof gathers over 50,000 gallons of rainwater each year which is treated and used to irrigate more than 40 different species of foliage located in and around the grounds.

With the website boasting the motto “Keep it free. Keep it local. Keep it green,” Live On the Green contributors say they are dedicated to remain Nashville’s leading eco-friendly concert series. Partnership with local organizations such as Second Harvest Food Bank and Walk/Bike Nashville help them to achieve this goal.

Second Harvest Food Bank positions volunteers at each recycling bin throughout the event to answer any recycling questions guests might have. Metro Water will also be on site providing tap water. Attendees are encouraged to bring reusable water bottles in order to decrease waste.

At the close of each evening everyone is asked to pick up just one piece of trash in order to keep the grounds beautiful and to help promote community pride. With any luck this year concertgoers will prove to be overachievers and make it two!

Live On the Green is presented by Lighting 100 and produced by Tuned In Broadcasting, Inc. in conjunction with the Nashville Mayor’s Office. For a complete artist lineup and more information including details on VIP upgrades visit

I hope to see you all on the Green!